Wednesday, April 29, 2009

7 days.

Perhaps you are asking yourself where i suddenly just popped from.
You see, i had vowed to watch news as rarely as i could. Damn i have missed a lot. Relevant shit.
If you start feeling denied of your rights, perhaps you need to revisit today's resolution. In the news. Could help.
5 women today asked all women to deny men of all conjugal rights, privileges or obligations thereto for 7 days. Yes, 7 days. you will share the same bed with a woman for 7 days with no penetration. No blow job, nothing! Not even coitus interruptus.
What blows my mind is i wonder if these women ever have sex. No prejudice, but they are the meanest looks alive. 5 women who can do better with botox. Why do i bring this up? Cool down buddy. The thing is they cited women from some Scandinavian country of having achieved change by denying men of $ex. I have a feeling mean women there get enhanced.

They even claim they have spoken to all first ladies and concubines and they are in.
Oops i need to end it there before i start feeling like i need to apologize.
Just thought you should know.

Monday, April 27, 2009


Its Sunday, technically Monday. I am depressed.

Sunday, April 26, 2009

6 months

Since I've been to an ATM. I tried to remember my PIN a couple of months ago...and couldn't. Went into an almost full blown panic attack. With time it did come back to me. But now the cash under the mattress is over. It's a good time as any, I suppose, to transition to a more normal existence.

Dual sim

I heard an ad some time back that made me wonder. Why am I still on Safaricom. Normally I pay no attention to ads and the like but I suppose when they give you actual information, rather than powerfoam plus, it's alright.

It didn't make sense whichever way I looked at it. So if I was on Zain, it would cost the same to contact my safcom contacts as it does now. Then it would cost less to contact guys on Zain. I didn't get it. Actually, I had been waiting for a while for safcom to unveil a new tarrif. Not YAP [Yet Another Promotion]. And I was thinking more recently that they are like Microsoft in some ways. At some point they will have to act on the fact that some fundamentals have changed. That is assuming they actually believe this is the case and are just stalling so as to milk as much cash from the cow as they can. Till just after revenues start to drop or something.

But being the eternal procrastinator, I'd done nothing about it. The problem with having multiple lines is the logistics of multiple phones. This is one area where chics have the advantage, and can put those [huge] handbags to use. Just throw a bunch of phones in there. No problem. I, on the other hand, find carrying around two phones rather tedious. I did, however, consider doing an aJamaa and getting a phone from my Bonga points and using it for a second line. But I realised that the only phone my points tally qualified for didn't have vibrate alert. Somehow using the term vibrator makes me a bit squirmish. There are still some gutters left in my head after all. Who knew. Anyway. A phone which can't vibrate is pretty much useless in my book, so I decided to hold onto my points for now. I can only imagine the liabilities they have based on this points business. It's no wonder they are imploring people to redeem them. Do they put them in their books or something. Can they just decide tomorrow that the promotion is over and if you haven't redeemed your points bahati mbaya.

So I started to look around for dual-sim phones. I became one of the masses that I often see peering into tu-shops with mobile phones. I always wondered what they were doing. Didn't everyone have a phone already. Not many options for me. A couple of samsung models, chinese ones and NOKLA. Ha. All this made me think whether it would really be cost effective. Will my anticipated savings from using another provider be greater than the cost of acquiring another phone. In the short to medium term. I didn't really think so. I don't run a business or anything and I actually don't call that much so the savings would likely be more in the head.

Still. I couldn't help but consider at least having another sim card. And on some sato, I went ahead and bought one. At 20 bob, even if it just lay there and gathered dust it wouldn't be such a terrible loss. So now I had a Zain line. But I'm not a fan of the sim shuffle so I wasn't going to use it until I got another phone. Then I remembered that Orange have a one bob forever thing going on, and yu [talk of a name change saving your bacon] have their crazy offers. What to do, what to do. Safcom would still get revenue from me. Probably the same amount as before even, seeing as I give them cash for internet access that I never used to before. Although even this isn't as certain anymore. But having four phones, or two dual-sim ones. Quite ridiculous.

Friday, April 17, 2009

Hey There

Been a minute ain't it? Don't get that? No? Not your kind of speak? Ok. It's been a while though eh? Actually, there's some guy who always says that to me when we meet. Once every three years I think. At some point we used to hang out at some dank alley in town drinking the stuff my liver is still suffering from. Since there was no music there, he and I would break into song every so often. We decided to become rap artists then. Of course I can never commit to anything so that stuff died. I think he went ahead and did a song. I can't remember his name so I can't point you in any direction to locate said song.

Anyways. What the deal?

Some guy's been grabbing our stuff eh? Some domquem punk. Setting it up on his blog as his own writings. Flattering, as 0.5 pointed out. Irksome still. Fuhgedabowdit.

0.5, I'm not married. For any intents and purposes. And if you keep saying that I will have to pummel you. I always wanted to use that word pummel. Sounds quietly serious. Filled with intent.

This post is simply a cracking of the knuckles. Testing. To see if my hands still work on keyboards. Been a long age.

More later. I hope.

Tuesday, April 07, 2009

Hats off

Isn't this your post Kamikaze?

And there is a lot more of introverted where that came from.
Guess its an inadvertent salute.

Mirror Mirror On The Wall.

We are getting as dry as bones. A harsh indictment but nevertheless one that is close to the truth. Just look at the blog activity. This blog was an accurate barometer of the collective excitement running in the group. So even in life, fun has gone to pot.
Either that or most of what is to be seen (and done) in the world has already been seen. And/or done.

A quick recap:
For all intents and purposes, Kamikaze is married. Enough said.
It is highly likely that aJamaa is heading down that road soon
Samborera, well, he is sort of vanished.
So has Matejivu.
Googler regaled us with an explosive post and then went under again
Helost, has only ever posted once! Can't blame him.
Other colorful characters, like the neighbour where we had some juicy nyama choma to toast aJamaa's move to the rainbow nation disappeared too. So did the colonel. When was the last time the man who went to Far East seen?

What was the last fun thing you did and when did you do it?