Saturday, April 19, 2008

How. Why.

So I got a letter on Wednesday. I got confirmed. How now. Can't believe it's been 6 months since they ambushed me. 4 months since I resigned. Tried to anyway. For some reason they were reluctant to accept that one. A couple of days after, at the staff party, my name was called out to receive some award. My surprise was totally camouflaged by my laughter. That was funny stuff. I'd handed in my resignation letter days before. And I was being feted for something I'd apparently come up with. Apparently. Everyone knows I'm not the creative type, and rarely come up with anything. But I figured it was their way of keeping me from doing something silly like not coming to work the following week. I was headed to the coast actually. Take some time off, they said. How many days do you need. 10? Only 10. OK. Bring the leave form after this.

So 10 days and the worst of the post-election violence ended, and I was back at work. I figured that they'd see the truth [I'm not cut out for management] and fire me. Projects are late [are projects ever on time], this and the other aren't working, but I'm still there. Twice I almost didn't come to the office at all, but I'm still here. I'm not sure how.

So I got a letter on Friday. I read it three times it was so unbelievable. Only after the fourth read did I get to the very end of the letter, and the section that said c.c Managing Director. They want to give me another award. Why now. I could guess who was behind the first one, but this. Who's idea is this. It's not like I've done anything exceptional. I haven't had to use recursion even once. Well, I used a recursive algorithm only once in all the two years I worked for an ISV. Still. Most [all] the stuff I've done has been trivial. There was a suggestion that it is the logical result of working "crazy" hours. Sure I'm in the office right now, but I typically leave at 1830 everyday. I know a host of people who work much longer hours. And it's not a good thing anyway, not having a life [woman].

I spent all of yesterday night trying to figure it all out, but came up with nothing. So I'll leave that at that and go have some drinks. I wonder if that alvaro drink will be in stock today. Reminds me of Recoba, and Arbeloa.


Blogger aJamaa said...

How important is the why really? You should not bother yourself with such issues. Ok in theory not worrying yourself sounds logical. But how one goes about not worrying themselves or preventing what happens outside from not affecting them inside is lost to me but I guess all we can do is continue the struggle otherwise we will overwhelm ourselves.

Last year when they popped me a level and I spent quite a lot of time wondering why me? After sometime the question changed to why not me? The thing has to be done and someone with two eyes, two hands and two feet (though not hairy) is bound to do it. So why not me? I am just as good as the next guy and although some are better and work harder they still have two eyes.

Besides its better to be in a position where 'good things' are coming your way than where bad things are coming your way. The how and why question would be much worse if you are asking why they seem to be out to get you and yet you are doing your thing.

You just keep doing your thing and go with the flow. There I go again with theoretical solutions.

Tuesday, April 22, 2008 5:25:00 PM  

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