Saturday, October 13, 2007

A 1,000 for fuel, 5,000 to die while driving drunk

The good police commissioner has done it to drivers again - those who like to drink and drive - poor bastards. The infamous Alcoblow should be back in the hands of our greedy police officers in a month or two. The owners of places like Buffet Park, K2, K1 are one step away from a heart attack because business will SHUT DOWN. If you frequent Carnivore, you will remember the police used to set base at the u-turn next to Uchumi - and flag down every car entering the road from the Carnivore side.

A fool and his money would soon be parted because all you need is to smell a glass of beer and the alcoblow device would light up like a Christmas tree. "Lete funguo, lete funguo kijana.....". It is at this point that you start addressing the miserable officer like you would an army general or president of a small country...and you would get cleaned out.

They put the fine at 10,000 shillings. Say it with me. 10,000! That is if I heard the rumor right. That means if the cops nab you nothing short of 5,000 as a bribe will cut it. I am absolutely sure no one will want to spend something like 5,000 on drinks and roasted meat, another 1,000 on fuel and then want to hand over another cool 5,000 to a police officer. And there some additional risks too, like for instance losing your driver's licence. You know how the police work; They like to make a public example of a clueless bloke every once in a while.

So what will happen? People will have to hire taxis to rave in these upmarket places. Or get designated drivers. Messy and complicated arrangements. Who likes to sip Dasani as the boys hit that Tusker and get cosy with equally inebriated girls? However, most people will just party at the locals. And that is bad news for pub owners in town, or Hurlingham, or any other place that is largely accessed by car. Owners will have to make arrangements with cops. For instance, the Carnivore establishment could pay a blanket fee for police not to set up checks along Langata road. Something has to give. I am sure there are some police who are already seeing windfalls. They will be sadly disappointed; Just like the City Council brothers. Not a single person smokes in public these days. People will device circuitous routes to avoid capture. Those who are not that imaginative will simply drink in places where they don't need to drive.

Its all good I guess. There will be less drunk drivers out there. That means the chances of getting run over will reduce. In any case, nothing changes for me. I don't have a car.


Anonymous kip said...

lol interesting ati adress the cop likean army general

Thursday, November 01, 2007 9:11:00 AM  

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