It's official
The first time it was mentioned, my response was a blatant "No". No way. Not me. Sitaki. My boss had to literally calm me down. I told her to talk to the next guy. At that point I figured that was the end of that and continued with my existence.
After about a week, I had another chat with the boss. I need to seriously think about what had been talked about before she offers. And quick. Next thing I know, I'm talking with my boss's boss. There's this situation, what do I think about it. I knew what this conversation was going to be about so the resistance in my response wasn't as strong as the very first time. I still voiced my hesitance [ever the one issuing disclaimers, giving them ample chance to rethink]. Go think about it he says, and get back to me in the afternoon. I got word at some point in the afternoon that I shouldn't go to see him after all. Tomorrow. It must have been evident that I wasn't ready.
So I went home and had a chat with the folks there. It became evident that I didn't have a choice. I couldn't run. Not now. Definitely not forever. Talk of epiphany. My life the way I thought of it would be over. Whether I liked it or not. I had the same feeling when I was 12. Exact same feeling.
Went back to chat with my boss's boss the next morning. Okay then, I go. Now that I don't really have a choice, let's go ahead. I'm then directed to my boss's boss's boss. No turning back now. I got the official letter today. I'm in management now [more like a tech lead]. I've told everyone I could that it's not the kind of thing I fancy, and there's a good chance I won't make it, and get fired as a result. I've gotten virtually the same response. You'll be fine. So this is the last time I'll bring up these particular insecurities.
This whole episode also made me consider how, if and when I've been running from [potential] galfriends, and that I can't, shouldn't run. Not forever anyway. But that's a story for another post.
posted by Samborera @ 20:40
3 Comments:
Considering the lengths which people go to get such heights as has been put on you,and the fact that you have the courage to resist leadership, i would say-you are truly a great kenyan.
Success in all your endeavours.
It's curious what others might see in us that we don't necessarily see in ourselves.
All the best.
Hopefully they landed you with a pay packet that will compensate for the additional headaches. Seems to me like you have plenty of leverage.
r - Assimilating others view of myself would make me a very different person. Very much more successful in this life anyway. The letter with revised pay came this week. Not sure it's commensurate with a movement that involved skipping one job grade, but it's never been about the money.
matejivu - My attempt at modesty [not saying anything] comes to naught. It's not so noble though, the resistance, seeing as it's borne out of fear and stubbornness.
The good wishes are appreciated. Much appreciated.
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