All the single [independent] ladies
I think I've been hanging out with guys for too long. Which reminds me. With the good doctor going off to the bunduz, it's going to be a total guy thing. He's the only one who brings the odd gal to the party. The first consequence has been a total disappearance of "kiswahili". I couldn't approach a gal seated alone on a counter if my life depended on it. The other has been getting too steeped in man-logic.
A couple of ladies were telling me how they're terrified of getting to 30 without being hitched. One mentioned that the pain would be less if one has a kid. And all those rich, successful, high flying career women? Single because men want to boss things, or are intimidated or some other reason I can't remember. I generally stopped having such discussions. But when you're seated opposite a chic with nothing to say except that the current rains don't deserve the El Nino tag, you grab onto whatever you can. What could possibly be wrong about a woman who earns twice what I do. It's great fun not having to sambaza. If she's into coffee at the Stanley and the like, it's either I don't do that scene, or she pays. Not really into that living beyond your means lifestyle. And her paying wouldn't make me feel terrible or anything. Not any more terrible than if 0.5 was paying. No emancipation issues here. I think the red bima chic got engaged or something. I would have stalked her otherwise. Still have her business card.
Whatever the case, I always say that there are indeed worse things than being single. And I should meet some of these independent ladies who guys are meant to be intimidated by.
posted by Samborera @ 22:37
3 Comments:
Most guys say this, until one day they say your paying for stuff is emasculating them, and would rather stay at home, than have you pay for stuff (I'm sure there's something I 'did' or 'said' to emasculate but honestly!). *speaking from experience here*
But IMO, people place too much importance on what they earn. I miss those younger relationships when none of the parties made any money, it didn't really matter, and life was good. The love was there even when I paid for coffee from my HELB account.
Balls are overated.
So at some point I'll morph into "most guys"? My track record certainly offers no evidence for it.
Time is the worst enemy. All things unravel. In the novelty of a relationship there is much mushy luvvy duvvy stuff going on that people temporarily ignore money and status. People get used to each other and the crushes disappear; Men sink back to their soccer, disorderliness, bumming and drinking ways, and women turn into terrible nags, talking endlessly and making fuss all over.
Arguments start. Some comments are thrown in anger .."you can't even afford to take me out once in a while" ..and the male pride is pricked to the quick. Its at this point that noises about being emasculated start coming up. Women always manage to bring out the fact they are doing better than you at some point somewhere down the road, either by attitudes or actions or saying it outright. When a guy starts getting these vibes, he wants out. Teens happens once, and its sweet cause you are not earning the money or bearing responsibility.
The moment you need to pull some weight, and time passes, the more undercurrents there are. Of course the quality of the relationship is defined by whether the guy can take it or not.
Me? My rules are simple. From the start, I will not date a woman who is taller, has more money or more intelligence than me (and by intelligence I don't mean stacking degrees). But we can have casual sex. At par I can live with. Exceeding? No.
Don't fight the house. The house will grind you to dust.
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