Firsts
They say there's a first time for everything. Well, everything that you get to do at least. A long weekend like the one just passed is the kind that can provide many such opportunities.
My first first was an encounter with the cops. Yup. I just hear stories but have never had one of my own. I'm pretty much a coward so I typically avoid being up and about during the night. So. The story is thus. It's like 2330. I'm walking in town, minding my own business. Ahead of me, I see two cops. I don't think too much about it, but familiar stories come to mind, all who's gist is avoiding cops when you see them. I'm not going to turn around, and I can't cross the street to avoid them. They are walking in the same direction I am but managed to look back and notice my lone figure. I'm as calm as the proverbial cucumber. As I pass next to them, one of them blurts out, "Unaenda wapi?". All the stories I've heard begin like that so some apprehension starts to creep in. "Naenda kucheza", I reply, or something like that, trying to muster all my swahili sanifu I can. This one very interested copper goes on. "Uko na pesa?". The red flags that 0.5 has seen so many times start going up for me also. I'm not sure how I'm meant to respond or what's going to come next. I try and be a responsible citizen and answer simply. "Ndio". "Ngapi?". I don't know the going rate for bribing a policeman on night patrol, but I have done nothing wrong. It's not even that late, to be accused of loitering or thinking of commiting a crime or something. "Ngiri", I reply hesitantly. This is now bordering on harassment, but they haven't taken the gloves off yet, so I continue smiling and being cooperative as if everything is alright, and I'm helping an old lady with directions. They go on for a while about how it's a good thing that I have money, but I sense some resentment at the fact that a kid like myself could have money to go out. I don't know about their circumstances but I know their pay can be better. The same applies to us all. "Na wapi msichana, ama unaenda kuwapata huko?". The tension is eased up a bit and I reply to the latter question in the affirmative, now hastening my steps in a it's-been-nice-talking-to-you manner. I even say thanks and wave them good bye. I really like the fact that there are a lot more cops patrolling our streets these days, and hopefully they won't harass you too much.
My second first was definitely more exciting. There's this chic I met on Friday during my escapades. As always, I ask for her number. Wait. I think she GAVE me her number. There's something about a chic who grabs your phone and puts her details in herself. Very exciting. Even writing about it is exciting. Anyway, Some time on Sunday I think, I'm exchanging smss with 0.5 about plans for the evening. I'm thinking of going to choices but I haven't decided yet. Mara, my credit ishas. I figure that if I'm to go out, I'll need some credit, and being 2200, I have to get some now. The guy at the shop doesn't have those 100 bob slips. I figure I'm unlikely to win a million bob anyway so I get the 250 kind. Has anyone here even gotten any free credit as a result of topping up? What a hoax. Anyway, rather than go on with my conversation with 0.5, I decide to call up my newly found friend. Nothing remotely novel so far, until I hanged up that is. That call lasted 21 minutes. There's a first for me. I have hit the highs of 15 mins on a couple of occassions, all with the same chic, but this was the most involving call I've ever made. I hope I survive the period of time that she's still in my phonebook.
posted by Samborera @ 01:02
1 Comments:
Report writing
Allow me to share one of the aspects of my job I detest most. Auditing is basically fun, one goes and talks to a few people, pretends to understand what they do, finds faults and recommends corrective action. The talking to people part is always fun since one gets to pick up alot of new knowledge. Infact I dont think I can have a job where I report to the same office everyday and spend the whole day at the same desk.
However, since there is no free lunch, a guy has to write a report at the end of every audit. This guyz have refined the art of report writing it basically involves the KYM in the ground doing all the writing, a manager reviewing the report and a partner doing the final review and sign off. It sounds easy doesn't it? Well you are wrong, the thing is I did Comp sci because I could not get into any course that required a descent grade in any of the languages, during my four years of campus a report was prepared by copying and pasting stuff from the net with the understanding that neither the student nor the lecturer would ever read the damn thing. So nothing I have ever done before has prepared me for report writing.
Another problem is that the reviewer on occasion has no idea what happens in the ground and as such require me to report on issues that are non-existant and make recommendations that cannot be implemented. The other issue is that the review process is iterative. I write, the reviewer requests amendments, I correct, the reviewer requests other amendments, I amend, and then the reviewer requests amendment to their own amendments. On occasion we go back to the version I had initially. There have been times when a report reviewed by a manager is completely trashed by a partner and so the manager who had initially okayed the document comes baying for my blood as if the trashed document did not involve them.
Report writing, however is nothing compared to timesheets. I will talk about this evil another day.
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