The "sister" card

I have just taken a heavy lunch. I need all my wits and my strength around me as I write this. The last time I ate a proper meal was Monday 19th lunchtime. For most of yesterday, I spent almost the entire day tracking my ATM. Without success of course. My string of calamities started last Friday.

I got the money alright. At around 06.30 PM, I give Eric a call and head to Hornbill. 10.00 arrives, this is Eric's usual departure time. Meanwhile, Deno (Samborera will know him) has checked in and is swallowing rapidly. We escort Eric and quickly head back to the bar.

There are two women at the counter. So we start chatting. They are sisters. Apparently. Deno, not being a slow fellow like I am zeros in on the younger chic and engages her in very serious conversation. I rack my head, looking for conversation and not succeeding. The two chics are making as if to leave the club. No no no.. That cannot be allowed to happen. More beer please! Drinks arrive and we continue. I am so high now.

Then Deno: please keep this chic busy so that I can disappear with the sister. As the chic in my company is about to finish, more beer arrives. I get new impetus. Deno and the chic announce they are leaving. I am sincerely hoping the "sister" will leave not consent to be left behind.
You are leaving.
Yes.
Have a nice time.
They are up and gone.
OK. What the heck? So, I am stumped. More beer. I inject exuberance that I was not really feeling into the conversation. At some point, I struck a topic which she could drone on endlessly. What a relief. Then suddenly and without warning.

Where do you stay? To which I reply and truthfully too. I always see many red flags when these kind of questions start being asked. So the next question obviously did not help.
Do you stay alone?
Have you guys met my older sister? She has suddenly sprang to life. So I go.
No dear, I stay with my elder sister and her family. She is always complaining about how I drink and I am a nuisance to everybody by going home too late.
This little speech always kills (well, almost) any designs a woman I meet at the bar may have about being taken to my digs. I don't have a sister.

Some soothing music starts playing. We rhyme and blue while still sitting on the uncomfortable bar stools.
She announces that she is not going to take another beer. Two words come out of her mouth.
LETS GO.

_______________________________________________!

I counter that its too early. I am trying to buy time. In reality, I am afraid. So I buy her a redds as we continue our chair dance. At some point, after more beer, I find myself walking out, in her footsteps, following her! I can't remember at which point I agreed that we can go. I was not thinking.

So where are we going? I ask.
My place? Then she mumbled incoherently (Or I was too drunk to hear properly). In short order we are in a mathree and moving and I don't even know where I am being taken. I don't care either.

We arrive. I sleep.

[there are things I would like to say here but I can't]

Today morning I wake up minus my phone, my door pass, my job id and the keys to my digs. A cd labelled "Div X codecs" which had miraculously stayed with me through the entire spree, was still on the table.
No woman in sight.
I can't find my wallet. Real panic sets in. I peek out the window. Very strange place. I am not sure whether to cry or laugh. All I know is that I am in deep trouble. I don't have money, nor my IDs. I can't withdraw.

Gladly I find my wallet. I am sooo relieved. The IDs are there. A couple of loose hundreds are gone. She did not find some 4000 bob that I had hidden in the deep recesses of my wallet.

I have heard these stories before. Always had a good laugh. This time I was in danger's mouth itself. I am still shaken by my goof. A buddy has invited me for a drink. I am not going. But I am only too glad to be safe and alive.
May be its a warning.
Tread carefully. Enjoy people.